Nervous...scared...excited????

Well.....I had my consultation with the orthopedic surgeon.  I had hopes that he would say the MRI was not bad, it would be an easy fix.  No such luck...it looks like surgery is in order.  Now, if I could just keep myself off the internet and researching information..geez, I even watched a you tube video of how the shoulder surgery is done.  Not a good idea.  My search for knowledge about stuff sometimes does not work in my favor.

He showed us the calcification within my ligaments...which is like having a rock in your shoe, depending on where the rock is, it either does not hurt or hurts like hell...I am the latter.  Whatever tears are in there will be repaired once he gets in there.  

I am nervous and scared...I have never been knocked out and intubated before...I have been knocked out so they could take out one of my wisdom teeth...but I was alert for the removal of the other three!  We all know that I do not do well in situations in which I do not have control.  I even asked Lee what he would do with my stuff if something happened to me.  Smart man said he would just keep it forever.

Recovery can be tough, especially the first couple days...for the surgery you get a nerve block from the neck to the waist...which also helps with pain.  I keep telling myself I had Elliott with minimal drugs, I can do this!!!  The surgery is tentatively scheduled for New Years Eve ( or a couple days later, in case the approval from our insurance takes extra time).  The sooner the better, because Lee will still be on holiday routine and Elliott does not go back to school until mid January.  I am sure after a week or two of them hovering around, I will be eager to see them go back to school and work.  

My to-do list grows each day...grocery shop, order Elliott's text books, get his bus pass early, pack up Christmas (and pack it for moving), get bills set up to pay automatically, make sure laundry is done, find all my jammies that button up the front, get prescriptions filled and on and on.   Ugh!  Most of that will get done soon after Christmas. 

Ok....enough rambling.  I am gonna go make dinner...pretty soon, I have to leave that up to the guys...Elliott will probably make me ramen for lunch everyday!