YES!!!!

Yes....it is the little things that make life wonderful! Tiny daffodils made my day this morning. They have been sprouting for weeks, and are pretty small compared to what I am used to...but they are blooming. Hopefully the tulips will as well. If you look closely...you can see there is an iris in there too....I love iris's....and I kick myself for not digging up the iris's that my dad gave me for the yard in Port Orchard. they were the cool ones that are purple and kind of a tan color...they look like they are antique.

It has been a really quiet week. Something great did happen in the last two weeks though....something that will make all of our parents proud. Lee has quit chewing tobacco. I was worried about saying anything to anyone...but, I cannot keep how proud of him I am inside any more. Lee started chewing when we were in Texas...and he was aboard the boat from Hell. He has been chewing for about 14 years. He knew I thought it was gross...but even though I hated it what can I say...Lee never gives me grief for my love of shortbread cookies and lattes. Well....one day Lee was really pissy....not typical behaviour for Lee lately. I kinda let it go...until he called me later in the day to say he was sorry. He told me he decided to quit chewing and it was tough. I asked "why now?".....and he said "I do not want to see your face, if I ever had to tell you I had cancer from something like chewing"....some days I wonder how did I get so lucky to have Lee. A valid reason to quit, but I wanted to make sure he was not doing it just for me. Lee, thankfully, has the support of the Coast Guard and the medical team at the Group prescribed Zyban. Zyban is a very mild anti depressant that really does wonders for people who want to quit smoking. The first week, you are allowed to chew/smoke like normal and as the medication works its way into your system you gradually lose the desire to chew/smoke. Ten days after starting, Lee had his first day without chew. He has had 7 since. He says there is no desire..but I will tell you the oral fixation is hard to stop, so he chews gum like a mad man. I am very proud of him....that is a big step and I am even more touched that he did it in the name of love.

Happy Birthday to my Mom....

Tomorrow, February 20th would have been my Mom's 67th birthday.

I searched my computer for a photo I had not posted before...and I found this one. This photo was taken in November 1984...and my parents smiles are totally fake. Not because they did not want to take the picture...it is because their barely 18 year old daughter was getting married that day. We all know how that turned out....but every heartache leads you somewhere and that heart break lead me to Lee. I would do it all over again.

When I look at this picture.....it is clear to me how supportive my Mom was of everything I did. Even the stupid stuff, I know she did not like some of the things I did, but I always knew she was there to catch me when I fell. Parents always say, I am doing this for your own good...and when you hear it...it just sounds like bullshit...but when I became the parent of teens...it all made sense. Sure, I would love to make all the decisions for the boys, to keep them with me, to always know they are safe and to protect them from heartache....but what would I accomplish....NOTHING! Mason will likely marry this year...and when he and Arrielle first talked about it...I kinda freaked out a little, it took me a while to remember that my parents freaked out a little too. Parents just want their kids to be happy. A parent will do anything to see joy on their child's face. Just as my parents did on this day way back when.

If I was home...in Washington, I would make my family gather together...and we would do like we have every year since my mom passed away...we would go to her favorite place to eat..Azteca...and Dad would eat her favorite meal, Chile Verde and we would have margarita's. I would always tear up, as we raised our glasses in my Mom's honor. I miss her, and in some ways I started this blog for her...because I could not keep what I was feeling inside...had to get some of it out, and this blog gave me a way of talking to my mom without seeming like I was talking to myself...does that makes sense???

So, I always wonder what I would do if I got one more day with my Mom. What would I want to do....and when I think about it, it is not so much a day that I desire, it is moments. I wish I would have told my mom that we were coming home to Seattle differently...instead I made it seem like it was the worst thing ever and I hurt her. I believe now that fate sent me there...hind sight is always 20/20. I would love to sit in the car with her again..with her driving...I do not even care where. I would love to share a double cheeseburger from McDonald's. Just five minutes of sitting at the kitchen table....would be wonderful. Online and in real life, I hear people complain about their mom's...how awful they are, that they are bitchy (yeah, I will admit my mom was pretty bitchy), this and that.....and I always think to myself...you are going to miss all this someday.

I do miss you Mom, every moment.................

Spring?????

You cannot live in the Pacific Northwest and not grow to love bulbs......not the ones that provide light, I am talking about the ones that provide the flash of color that let you know spring is coming!! Daffodils and tulips!!! They are some of my favorite flowers. I had a huge pot of yellow and red tulips on our porch in Port Orchard...I loved the burst of color. When we got here, thinking it would not take forever to get into our home I ordered bulbs to plant for spring. Daffodils and tulips...and something else I cannot remember. They were stored in the back of the truck....trying to keep them as close the the temperature outside as possible until we moved in. When we moved in, the ground had frozen due to some really cold days and then the rains came and it was too wet. So, I put all the bulbs into the the only pots that survived the move. These pots are loaded with bulbs. The fun thing about planting them this way is you do not know what you are going to get...kind of like a gift. I am thrilled that they are growing, especially since they were planted almost three months late. I cannot wait to see if they bloom.

We did a little yard work over the weekend. Lee and I decided that all of our spring and summer flowers will be done in pots rather than in the ground. That way we can move whatever is looking the best to the front of the house, and those that need different sunlight to the back. We have a great back patio, that is completely covered. We have even enjoyed some grilling this winter. I want to get a shepherd's hook to hang my bird feeders. I also want to try those plant containers that grow upside down, I saw tomatoes and a hummingbird attracting one filled with flowers. I will post pictures as I can.

Valentines day....was really nice. Lee took me to Curley's. Curley's has amazing food, but you can totally stroll in wearing jeans and your favorite tee shirt. It can be expensive, but Lee did remind me that we hardly ever go out like that anymore. We both had delicious filet mignon (Lee's well done and mine a perfect "medium"), and baked potatoes...I ate my asparagus...Lee did not!! We also had dessert. It was really just nice to actually spend the evening with him, after so many years apart that was the best gift of all!

Some thoughts and prayers for a special family....

Meet precious Piper Michelle.....a little princess who wanted into this world so badly she came in to it way too early. Piper is the niece of my wonderful friend Deana, in Port Orchard. Deana and I worked at the bank....and I can say we bonded pretty well...right down to the matching Twilight tattoos. Deana's sister Jolette and her husband Shawn are Piper's proud parents, she is also joined my a beautiful sister named Chloe.

Piper arrived after only inhabiting the womb a mere 25 weeks....on February 10th. She weighed only 1 pound and 11 ounces at birth. She has quite a road ahead of her. She is at the University of Washington NICU...the absolute best place she can be. Jolette is keeping us all posted via Facebook, and the last note said Piper was doing good!!

So, if you have a moment...send a little thought or prayer Piper's way...she needs them all, so does her family...they are pretty special to me.

Yeah...we are weird...so what!!!

How did this happen???? Elliott is 17 today!!!

My baby boy...is 17 today....and some days, I long for one last moment of him as a baby. That feeling you get when something so small and precious is snuggled on your chest and sleeping away. I am excited for him and his future...but as a mom my heart is breaking. You go from being the provider of their every need, being their hero....and evolve into someone they call once in a while. It makes me wonder what my role in their lives will become.

So, tonight we will celebrate, with dinner at Applebee's...where Elliott will feast on hot wings...and come home to the same cake he has requested for 10 years, the same one as in the picture above...an ice cream cake made by mom. As always, his gifts will be video games he has requested.

I love you Elliott, enjoy your birthday!!!

Woo hooo....company!!!

My Aunt Coleen called last Sunday and said there was a chance my cousin Rhonda would be passing through....I was pretty excited. When Rhonda and her sister Raelyn were younger....like 23 years ago...they were my partners in crime. We camped at the ocean, we must have gone to the Olympia brewery a million times, Enchanted Village, Seattle, Rhonda even road tripped with me to California once...we had lots of fun back then. Then we all grew up....and the burdens and joys of being adults have kept us apart alot. So, needless to say I was pretty excited for this visit. Rhonda got here a little after 7...after a super long drive from Palm Springs. She was exhausted from the drive and we all just relaxed. The plan was that she would drive home to Federal Way the next morning. I took her to breakfast the following morning.....and Rhonda decided to chill out and stay another night with us....which was pretty awesome. We laughed at the little sign on our table advertising hemp beer...complete with the little leaf...only in Humboldt county!!! We spent some of the afternoon in Arcata...Rhonda remembered from a visit here in 1993 a store where they scent lotions and body washes with whatever scent you picked. Arcata...I think I have blogged about it before...but Arcata could really be it's own planet!!

I had a nice visit with her, and it was really nice to have a little piece of "home" in our new home. It made me excited for all the people who have mentioned they want to come this summer!! I say...bring it on!!

Oh, by the way... HAPPY SUPERBOWL!!! My dad's favorite holiday!!

Another earthquake....

We had another earthquake today (click on the title of this post to see an article fron CNN)....It was not raining and there was quite a bit of breeze going, so I had the windows open....until I felt it, I thought the earthquake was just the wind. This afternoons quake was a 5.9. Not as scary as the last one. The shaking was a lot different, this one was also centered farther away and deeper. This one scared the mom in me though...Lee was at work and Elliott was at school. Elliott's high school was built in the 1920's....it has been retro-fitted to be earthquake safe though. I did not care if he got in trouble and I texted him while he was in class. We worked out this plan with the last earthquake...texts worked better than calling last time. He assured me he was fine.

Speaking of Elliott's high school....we just got his first report card from Eureka High....all A's and B's. The bummer about switching states in high school is that each state has their own exit exam. Elliott took the California High School Exit Exam last fall. He took the WASL a couple times, each time getting closer and closer to passing (he actually passed the writing and was very close to passing the math portion)...Washington's state test....and that test kinda hard. I told him, just go in there and do some re-con....if you do not pass there are lots of chances to try again. Well, I had his report card for a couple days, I just pulled it out and looked at his grades and nothing else.....apparently there was a second page...he passed the California exit exam wit flying colors!! Way to go Elliott!!!

Here is Elliott's school picture for this year...you can tell he flattened his hair down with his hands, making sure nothing was sticking up.

Monday's this and that...

Check out this picture of Fernbridge (the bridge that takes you to Ferndale).....how pretty is that. I wish I could say I took it but I copied it from the local paper. We had a nice weekend here...the weather was nice...for Humboldt in late January. No rain and Saturday night was clear enough for Elliott and Lee to see the largest full moon of the year. Elliott is taking Astronomy...and brings us awesome little tidbits of information like that!

Friday nights all right for fighting...the song goes something like that. Actually, there were no fights at Emily's basketball game. Ferndale high's girls JV basketball team played Hoopa....they lost, but it is really fun to watch. As Lee says "we don't know enough to fight with the ref's yet...but we are on our way". We are slowly figuring out how this game is played. We both mentioned that we wish we could see Arrielle's sisters play while we were in Port Orchard...they are both really good.

Saturday....grocery shopping! Being on a tighter budget has been kind of a blessing. I have to be much more organized when shopping for groceries and household items. I plan what we are having for dinner for the next couple weeks, take stock of the pantry and freezer and go from there. I am learning to be less wasteful. Like today....I bought too many apples a couple weeks ago...so instead of tossing them...they became apple pie! I totally would have thrown them away, this time last year. The oatmeal packets that Arrielle and I did not eat last spring...I emptied them into a bowl and mixed them with other ingredients to make treats for the dog.

Sunday was nice and lazy...all I did was work on organizing the huge amount of scrap booking supplies I have. Lee worked on his motorcycle and Elliott did homework and played video games.

Elliott has what appears to be a nasty cold...sore throat and congestion. Poor guy...I do the same thing my mom did to us...I make the kids get up and shower and if they still feel crappy then they can stay home. I hope he feels better in a day or two.

We may get some company later this week. My cousin Rhonda may stop here for overnight. I am pretty excited about that, I just hope it all works out.

Well, Elliott just woke up from a 4 hour nap....time to go check on him.